HILARIOUS,,, TRENDING IMAGES TODAY !!

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SHOCKING !!! K.U STUDENTS GET STUCK DURING SEX

News flying in indicate that Drama unfolded outside one of the ladies hostels in K.U during the weekend, after word went round like a burnig bush, that two intense lovers had got stuck into each other during an amorous congress, and had been rushed to the health unit hospital for a “separation of powers” of witchcrafty.

The shocking news attracted a huge crowd of students and villagers from K.M market who created a lot of traffic outside the health unit/ hospital to witness the off-the-wall incident. So riotous were the youthful crowd that the management of the hospital had to call the police from Ruru Police Station, who lobbed teargas canisters to disperse the curious onlookers.

When media team crew visited the hospital,  later on to file this report, the gate was locked and the hospital security and administration declined to speak to the press over the matter, terming it as “sensitive”.  According to multiple sources, the unfortunate man who found his crucial toolbox clamped is an employee of a sugar production company working on a major highway.

 In the morning of the fateful day, the two lovebirds that one live in inside the campus/ hostel and the other in K.M rental houses  town, allegedly got “locked” as they attempted to have quick early morning act of the rod commonly referred to as ‘morning glory’. “At the steamy love heights, the couple realized they had been clamped together and began groaning and writhing in pain, as their screams attracted neighbors who came to help,” said a source at the estate. He added that the driver of a Pro-box rushed to the scene and ferried the two to the hospital. However, the hospital administration sent them away, claiming they didn’t have capacity to separate the two. The Good Samaritans who had rushed them to the hospital were forced to rush them to an undisclosed location.

One of the locals claimed the husband of the two-timing woman had been tipped off about his wife’s philandering and had consulted a witchdoctor who cast a spell on her. Immediately word reached him that his wife had been caught locked in gland-to-gland combat with another man, the husband declared he was only going to “unlock” them after the honeycomb-thieving man parts with Sh200, 000. “All the players in Kenyatta university  have been put on notice that they can’t keep raiding others’ jars for cookies and think they can get away with it,” warned one angry resident.

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KIKUYU WOMEN DESCRIBED!! KENYAN JOKES 2015

Muthoni- They are polite and
quiet but get
pregnant a lot.
Wanjiku- most are beautiful.
Wangare- They talk a lot!
Wangui- They act like they know it
all.
Nyambura- A little bit shady.
Wairimu- Very intelligent.
Nduta- They are players.
Shiro- They are drama queens.
Njeri- Cheeky and funny.
Wangeshi- They are caring.
Njoki- They are very holy and
close to God.
Washuka- They love sex a lot.
Wambui- Very choosy and
secretive.
Nyawira- They love being
pampered and
coaxed.
Mukami- No nonsense and don't
entertain
bullshit!
Nyaguthii- They rarely stick at one
place.
Always on the go!
Waitherero- Very clean.
Waithera- They have a big heart
and very
patient.

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Police jokes 2014

Police: where do u live?
Me: with my parents
Police: where does ur parents live?
Me: with me
Police: where do u all live?
Me: together
Police: where is ur house?
Me: next to my neighbors house
Police: where is your neighbors
house?
Me: if i tell you u wont believe
me.
Police: tell me
Me: next to my house

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