KBL to introduce a low-priced brand in the market, to counter illicit brews.

Kenya: Battle for a share of the low- end alcohol market is set to go a notch higher. This follows plan by Kenya Breweries Limited (KBL) to introduce a low-priced brand in the market, to counter illicit brews. While there is a ban on spirits sold in sachets, most of these brands have surfaced in rural areas where business is booming.

Nairobi’s newest socialite Corazon Kwamboka is not keen on covering those curves

Following a few weeks of silence, she has unleashed a new set of pictures, which many would say are a little more decent that her previous ones

ken wa maria proposes to lupita

Ken wa Maria has released a new song dubbed Lupita Nyong’o in which he proposes marriage to the Oscar award winning actress. In the song, Ken wa Maria promises to take Lupita to his home in Matuu and together they will bring forth many

Who would resist arest?

A certain police woman on Kiambu road has caught the public eye, not sure whether its for a good or bad reason. The officer in question has her photos making rounds on the internet thanks to her tight skirt.

hurchil becomes kenyas first individual to hit 1m facebook likes

Daniel Ndambuki, better known as Churchill, yesterday became the first Kenyan individual to reach 1 million likes on Facebook.

Showing posts with label MCHONGOANO. Show all posts
Showing posts with label MCHONGOANO. Show all posts

Tuesday, 13 May 2014

Mchongoano Kali 2014

15:34  ,  2 comments
TUENDELEE AMA TUSIENDELEE?

1: Maid wenu ni zuzu alinunua
mandazi kwa hoteli alipofika
nyumbani akazichemsha ili apate
supu
2: Naskia babu yako ni mkali sana
akikasirika sana anakunywa
painkillers!!!
3: Boyfriend wako amekonda mpaka
ikawa shingo ni kubwa kuliko mwili
3: wewe una dhambi mpaka
shetani anakuchongoa
4: Umesota hadi unanunua
sambusa za mtumba
5: wewe ni maskini hadi
unatengeneza sausage za viazi
6: kwenu ni mbali hadi saa za
kwenu mmefunga aerial!!!!
7: wewe ni hadi unatengwa na
laini za vodacom
8: Naskia mke wako ni mweusi hadi
ukimbusu lips zako zinaungua
9: Baba yako ni mchoyo hadi
akinunua mkate anasema kila mtu
anuse na akalale.
10: wewe ni mfupi hadi ukivaa buti
zinafika shingoni,!!!!!!!!

ongeza na zako hapo kwa comments ...

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Sunday, 11 May 2014

HESHIMA SI UTUMWA JOKES: Toboa siri

13:08  ,  1 comment
Hebu tuheshimiane. Acheni
madharau za pesa nane.

> I was walking along Muthithi road
beshte yangu aka-roll na ndaì na
kudai, "Vipi boss nikuwai lift?"Nani
boss kati ya mi na yeye?

> Unakunywa keg yet kifala flani
kinakushow umbaiye RedBull.

> Uko job yet una flash hustler.

> Madame kudai umlipie taco yet
unakaa Mukuru ama no nane.

> Unatumia C118 halafu dame yako anakudai umsambaze 5 bob yet anatumia BlackBerry ama Tablet.

> You live unda medication na ma-
doki wamegoma yet best yako,
anakushow, si ujifanye uko msick
upewe off.

> Msee anajua tu poa that huna teli
kwako yet anakuuliza kama ulicheki
game/news jana usiku. Alitaka ulale kwa neighbour?

> Unadunga mjengo inda yet kibuda fulani kwa mat anakudaisha change ya thao.

> Unaenda supermarket, una buy
vitu mob na change ni 68 bob
cashier anakushow utake pad ama
lolipop.

> Unaspin tuktuk yet dame ako na
RRS anakushow, "Your tire is flat."

> Kwenu mko familia ya mtu kumi yet besty yako anakushow, "Hawa watu huzaana ovyo do wameharibu our
economy".

> Teachers wako on strike yet una
ask mmoja wao kwani wanalipagwa
ngapi.

> Kukosa ku-contribute kwa
fundraiser ya msee yet umetumia
500 fare kuattend.

> Jamaa anakushow ule poko/
barmaid wako anakutafuta yet mko
na bibi / manzi yako.

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