KBL to introduce a low-priced brand in the market, to counter illicit brews.

Kenya: Battle for a share of the low- end alcohol market is set to go a notch higher. This follows plan by Kenya Breweries Limited (KBL) to introduce a low-priced brand in the market, to counter illicit brews. While there is a ban on spirits sold in sachets, most of these brands have surfaced in rural areas where business is booming.

Nairobi’s newest socialite Corazon Kwamboka is not keen on covering those curves

Following a few weeks of silence, she has unleashed a new set of pictures, which many would say are a little more decent that her previous ones

ken wa maria proposes to lupita

Ken wa Maria has released a new song dubbed Lupita Nyong’o in which he proposes marriage to the Oscar award winning actress. In the song, Ken wa Maria promises to take Lupita to his home in Matuu and together they will bring forth many

Who would resist arest?

A certain police woman on Kiambu road has caught the public eye, not sure whether its for a good or bad reason. The officer in question has her photos making rounds on the internet thanks to her tight skirt.

hurchil becomes kenyas first individual to hit 1m facebook likes

Daniel Ndambuki, better known as Churchill, yesterday became the first Kenyan individual to reach 1 million likes on Facebook.

Showing posts with label SHENG SLANG. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SHENG SLANG. Show all posts

Monday, 17 November 2014

MABABI KUWAKILISHA NA U-SOURCE , WAAAAH !!

Nahusko Dubz kuna campo nifla ina julikana kama American University of Dubai. Hiyo chuo majority ya mastiude wako miaka ka 24/25,lakini jo!uki yebi parking lot unaweza chizi. Zile mandae ziko parking uta get ndae kama Rolls-Royce,Ferrari, Aston Martin na akina Bently.Hizi ni zile ndae una expect kuzi yebi kwa ma filo zile noma noma.Lakini kwa hisihi campo ni ma stiude wakonazo.Ndae kama Range Rover ni gari iko chini tu sana, Inasemekana ni gari ya pesa kidogo.Nashindwa ukiwa na ndae kama hiyo una du nini chuo.

Sunday, 16 November 2014

GOVA KUDEDI JU YA TEI,GEJ, WABA SHENG SLANG LATEST

Kuna karau/mbanga nifla alilazimishwa ku
take tot kinde na sita (16) za
makali
na azikunywe na dakika salasa.
Akiwa
kwa harakati ya kunywaku aka
lemewa na aka anza kumwaora. Na
hakuna venye msee mwingine
angemsaidia kunywaku. Hata wife
wa
kwake alikuwa hasapo lakini
hangemsaidia kunywaku juu ilikua
dare ya aina yake.

Sa vile boiz alianza kumwaora, wife alikuwa anataka kumuokolea lakini du. Hata
ma gova wenzake na wasee hu
serve kwa baesa hawange eza
kumwokolea, wacha hivyo, hata kumkaribia i-say.

SEE ALSO:

Sasa ikabaki mjamaa/m-guyz
amekamanyuria.
Doki anadaisha
boiz alikamanyuria juu ya kukata
waba kibao sana at once na mwili
haingeweza kuihandle, ilikuwa kundialalaa.....

Tunaingiza time ya mabash na
watu
kujibamba kwa mabaesa, mtaani
nini nini, tunaomba tu, ka huwezani na tei, temana tu nayo jo!

Sheng za Nairobi

By Toboa siri

Machizi wa nairobi na Githurai (Thika road Superhighway) Machizi NAIROBI na Thika Road

image

Official Sheng za Nairobi Facebook page

Saturday, 15 November 2014

SHENG SLANG, SWAHILI WORDS, DICTIONARY, NAIROBI

So if you are ever in Nairobi,
there are certain words you
will hear people say. It is
nice to familiarize yourself
with them and maybe
surprise someone with your
basic sheng, here we go:
Greetings
All of the following words
mean ‘hello, how are you
doing?’
1. Niaje (knee-ah- jay).
2. Sasa. Pronounced as
it is.
3. Mambo.(ma-m-bow).
It could also be
something like
‘Mambo vipi’, which
is also acceptable.
4. Howayu- Pronounced
like ‘How are you’
without the spaces
in between the
three words.
People
1. Mother- Mathee
(ma-they), Mum,
matha (pronounced
like ‘mother’), old
lady. Use the words
‘mathee’ and ‘matha ‘
with caution as they
may be disrespectful
in some settings, if
you want to play
safe, then call her
‘Madam’.
2. Father- Buda
(pronounced as it
is), mbuyu (m-bu-
you), old man, mzae
(m-za-ay)
3. Sister- sis, mtasis(m-
ta-sis)
4. Brother- Bro, broda
(brow-da),
5. Grandmother- Shosh
(show-sh), mnyanye
(m-nya-nye). It is
worth noting that
the ‘nya’ sound is
similar to ‘ña’ in
spanish in the word
‘niña’.
6. Grandfather-
Grandpa, guka (gu-
ka).
7. Cousin- Cuzo (cuu-
zo)
8. Wife- wife
9. Husband- Huzzy
(Her-zi), Hubby.
10. Mistress/man you
are having an affair
with- Mpango wa
kando (m-pango wa
ka-ndo), in Kiswahili
it literally translates
to a side
arrangement.
Clande (clan-day)
11. Girl- Dem (dame),
mrembo (m-rem-
bore) or mresh,
sister, Chile (chil-ay)
and boys sometimes
call them mami.
12. Boy- Chali (Cha-lee),
Kijana (Key-jah-na)
Every day words you need to
know
1. Matatu- This is the
14 seater or 32
seater mini-van that
is used as public
transport in all parts
of the country. In
sheng, we call it
‘mat’ or
‘Nganya’ (nga-nya)
2. Beer/ Alchohol-
Pints, keroro (kay-
row-row), Gej
(gauge)
3. Leave- Bounce,
Twende (tu-ende, e
as in egg)
4. Money- Pesa, ganji
(gah-n-gee), doh
(dough), mapeni
(ma-pay-knee),
mkwanja (m-kwa-
njah).
5. You guy- It means
the same thing as
‘dude’ in
conversation.
6. Sawa (sa-wa)- It
means ok or cool. If
if you someone says
something you agree
with you respond by
saying ‘sawa’.
7. Beba beba!!- This is
a phrase used by
matatu conductors
when they are trying
to woo in passengers
into the vehicle, it
roughly translates to
‘get into the vehicle’
or ‘board the
vehicle’ but in
Kiswahili it literally
means ‘carry carry’.
8. Haiya (her-ee-ya). Its
a word used to
express surprise,
whether good or bad
e.g. ‘Haiya! You
bought a new car?’
9. Nini- Very widely
used by Kenyans. It
acts as a filler in
conversations.
Normally it refers to
a thing, and means
‘thing’ . It is used
to refer to
something whose
name you do not
know or cannot
immediately
remember. e.g. I
saw Mary wearing
that nini on her
head that looks like
a bow.
10. Nani- Just like the
above word, nani is
a filler in
conversations as
well. It refers to a
person whose name
you cannot
remember at that
moment or do not
know. e.g. I went to
nani’s place, Tom’s
friend, to get my
phone charger.
11. Mzungu (M-zu-ngu).
White person, simply
anyone who is white
regardless of where
they come from. The
exception is for
people of Chinese/
Korean/Japanese
descent who
are called;
12. Ching Chong.-
Because one day a
Kenyan was listening
to Chinese and
thought that
Chinese had a lot of
‘ching chong’ in it,
and because a lot of
us do not know how
to differentiate
between Chinese/
Korean/Japanese
people, all people
with slit eyes are
hence referred to as
‘Ching Chong’.(Sorry
for the cultural
insensitivity, was not
intended)
13. Maze (ma-zay) – this
is a tough one! It
roughly translates
‘man’ when used in
conversation. The
way Americans use
it, like when they
say ‘Man! this
burger tastes like
cardboard!’ . That is
exactly how we use
it, so if it was a
Kenyan speaking it
would be, ‘Maze!
this burger tastes
like cardboard!’
14. Eish! (ay-ish)- Its a
word used to
express surprise,
most likely a
pleasant surprise.
For example; ‘Eish!
You have a nice
dress!’.
15. Ati (ah-tee). This
word can mean
many things but the
most common
meanings are ‘what’
and ‘that’. For
example;
‘Ati?’ meaning ‘what?’.
Commonly used when
someone says something that
you didn’t hear or
understand.
‘Ati Hannah is pregnant?’-
Means, ‘That Hannah is
pregnant?’ . This statement
shows that you are shocked
that Hannah is pregnant.

image

Friday, 18 July 2014

KENYAN JOKES 2014, Throwback! SHENG LANGUAGE

Tunga sentensi ukitumia neno “KUKU”… (15 Mks)

- kuku yule ni mpenzi wa
njoroge.

- l am a KUKUyu from Nyeri
COWnty

- Hi! am Mwangi frm Nyeri.KUKUmiss nayo!

- Siku Hizi KUKU amekuwa
mtamu na mapenzi..nkt!!!!
mayai ya kuku kutoka nyeri
sikuli ngo!

- My husBIRD is so HENsome!
Mwangi amenunua KUKUmanga

- Mundu wa nyomba #alimanga kuku na ugali usiku.

- Mwanaume wa nyeri alimwaga baada ya bibi yake kumwam kukumiss nayo…,

#Adisia

image

JUST FOR LAUGHS, BEER

Woman: Do you drink beer?
Man: Yes
Woman: How many beers a day?
Man: Usually about 4
Woman: How much do you pay per beer?
Man: 200/=
Woman: And how long have you been
drinking?
Man: About 20 years, I suppose
Woman: So a beer costs 200 and you have 4
beers a day which puts your spending each
month at 24,000. In one year, it would be
approximately 288,000/=, correct?
Man: Correct
Woman: If in 1 year you spend 288,000, not
accounting for inflation, the past 20 years puts
your spending at 5,760,000, correct?
Man: Correct
Woman: Do you know that if you didn’t drink
so much beer that money could have been put
in a step-up interest savings account and after
accounting for compound interest for the past
20 years, you could have now bought a Range
Rover?
(Man gets pissed off)
Man: Do you drink beer?
Woman: No
Man: What color is your Range Rover.?!
Woman: ( SILENT )

TRENDING THIS WEEK

SPORTS